Gifts Freely Given

Cast your bread upon the waters.  Then don't look back.


How many times have I heard one child yelling at another, "But you gave that to me, it was a gift!"  And the other yells back, "You don't play with it so I'm taking it back!"  Kids like to give old toys to each other, but rarely does it seem like a gift freely given.

In watching how people around me give of themselves, either through tangible or intangible means, I thought about the scripture that says "Cast thy bread upon the waters: for thou shalt find it after many days."  (Ecclesiastes 11:1)  Throwing bread out on the water makes me think of feeding ducks.  You just throw the bread and they eat.  You don't row out onto the pond, discuss with the ducks how much effort you put into making the bread and how you bought special flour just for them.  You don't come back the next day and ask if they liked the bread.  And you don't get angry if they left the bread to rot on the edge of the pond or let the geese eat instead of them.  You just throw the bread out for the joy of knowing that maybe the ducks will like it.  And then you let it go.


Many people have a hard time letting go when they give a gift.  They give more for the feeling of being appreciated than for the joy of giving.  How many of us have things we received that we feel we must display so that the giver knows we appreciate them?  How many have looked around the house of someone to whom we have gifted to see if what we gave is out for all to see?  I am guilting of looking through relatives' Christmas pictures to see if the gifts I sent made the grade of being included in pictures.  And opening up the mailbox, wondering if a thank-you note was sent.  (I'm much more guilty of being the one who didn't send the thank-you note.)


So I try to teach my children that the real joy of giving is just feeling good inside about giving a thoughtful gift.  Kids will break the birthday party gifts you give.  I won't even buy birthday cards for kid parties any more because those just end up right in the trash - I make my kids draw a card for the birthday child.  Adults will re-gift or exchange gifts.  If you give them money to pay a bill, they use it to buy designer sneakers.  It's OK.  You were generous and gave out of the goodness of your heart.  Let it go and start noticing the many gifts that people give you you.


Because the bread that comes back to you after you cast yours on the water was thrown by someone else.


ALB